Battle Cry
Check out this post at Misplaced Mama. Then spread it around the internet a little. We Mama’s gotta start a little backlash of our own!
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Wow -that restaurant was out of this world bad. I mean seriously! In Calgary they put in a by-law that restaurants couls serve kids OR have smoking sections and you wouldn’t believe the family fariendly restaurants that actually chose smokers.
I am of two mind of this. I don’t get my knickers in a knot over SAHM. I’m not that literal that I think people expect me to physically STAY at home. It’s in my mind not an offensive term, it just stays that you are at home instead of at a paying job. A WAHM in my opinion is someone who has a paying job from home.
I also think that parents take their kids to WAY too many places that they shouldn’t. Doug and I went to a very fancy restaurant — quiet, expensive. And there was a couple with two very normal, but all the same loud and messy kids. Not the place for them. Same thing with Business Class on teh airplane. Just because parents can afford to sit there I think that there should be a 12 and up limit because there are people who travel as part of their work and they should have some place they can work in relative peace. Or the movies. I get so irritated when there are small kids in a very non-kids movie theatre, usually at the late show. They are understandably loud and tired. Because there is a time and place for kids. In that article she quoted she referenced that parents may feel guilty that kids are in care all day and that’s why they bring them to inappropriate places — and that may be it.
I hate that on the plane, in the mall or whatever that my biggest fear is that the kids will act out and someone will think poorly of me. That’s stupid of me and I need to get over it. But I do think that children are not something to be ashamed of — and how dare someone expect a child to act like an adult!
Ranting here….
Comment by Jenn — 09.20.06 @ 5:29:35
Wow — typos — I think I set a new record:)
Comment by Jenn — 09.20.06 @ 6:52:51
Oh my god. How do children learn if we can’t take them out and show them the world? My children are always out shopping and at restaurants with me and I think it’s important that they feel like part of the family and do those things.
Comment by Beth — 09.20.06 @ 9:34:26
this is something i think about a lot. in the U.S., where it is still legal for parents to physically and emotionally bully their kids, it’s not surprising that most people don’t repect and value children as equal members of humanity. i think in general, children will behave as well as they are treated and as well as their maturity levels will allow. it is absurd to expect young children to be as quiet and self-controlled as an adult in public places.
i think businesses that WANT to cater to families that include small children need to be more understanding and encourage their other customers to be respectful of children as well. at the same time, i do not expect 5-star restaurants to cater to such families, and that’s fine with me. if i’m paying $50 for my entree, i don’t want a stranger’s food thrown in my hair either, whether that stranger is 3 or 33.
Comment by sarah — 09.21.06 @ 6:24:44
I agree with what a lot of the posters have said. As with most things parenting (and in life) I fall a little in the middle. People SHOULD be more patient, esp. with children, but parents also need to be considerate (of their kids and others) when choosing where and when to travel. The extremes on both sides–not allowing children unless their behavior can be guaranteed or the parents who expect everyone to accept all behavior as ‘kids will be kids’– are unreasonable.
I do think, however, that as a rule our society often does seem to be less patient as a whole as adults and kids are pulled in more directions. This results in two negatives for parents. Adults are often less tolerant and the kids are asked to do more. I also think that for every example that comes to mind in which I have been in a situation in which I feel children were allowed to behave inappropriately, I can think of at least twice as many times that adults were inconsiderate, too loud, or outrite obnoxious. Unfortunately it is harder to ban rudeness so these people aren’t the easy target that kids are.
Comment by Bonnie — 09.21.06 @ 6:56:37
Wow! The post in the link and the comments left here bring to mind so many, many things. I’ve often thought about how businesses (like Target and family restaurants) should be more family friendly. I’ve also tried not to bring my children into situations/places where it will be difficult for them to be. Sometimes, however, that is simply unavoidable.
I suppose there is no easy answer here. Mothers (and fathers) will always want things made easier for them. Some business owners and patrons without children will always think children who are acting like children are rude.
I guess since I’m the mother of two (and one on the way) I’m partial to that side of the argument. Just why can’t there be more family restrooms? Just why can’t there be at least a comfy chair for nursing? Just why can’t aisles be made a tad larger to accomodate strollers? I could go on, couldn’t I?
Meanwhile, I guess one of the lessons my children will learn from those difficult times is that life ain’t always easy and sometimes you just have to deal with it.
Thanks for bringing the post to our attention, Jeanette! It was well worth the read!
Comment by Lisa P — 09.21.06 @ 7:19:35