the television zombie

there are occasionally
days where
it’s necessary
-despite the begrudging
nature of my relationship
with this particular piece of electronic
gagetry-
to be grateful for
television
although I would love to be
the kind of mother
who fills every day
with inventive art projects
and long nature walks
and heart and soul inspiration
and never needs to rely
on anything as
mindless as spongebob
the reality is that today
I had pages of math
homework and a trip
to prepare for
and cleaning to do
and there is no way
I can be everything
to everyone
all the time
and so television as babysitter
was where it was at
and I don’t feel too
bad about them going all
zombie in front of nick jr.
because I know that
after they fell asleep last night
I turned the hall light on
(to see a bit better)
I snuck into their room
and spent endless moments
just soaking in the
utter and complete
beauty of my daughters
tracing a nose with my finger
and brushing back sweaty hair
off her head
and leaning in close to hear their
breath
and although I don’t
have a picture to share
in those moments I was
so filled with gratitude and
wonder and love that
it was almost too intensely sweet to
even write about
so today
I will thank the tv for providing
me space and time to work
because I think that
the power of my love for them
balances out a little
benign neglect.
Don’t you?